2
Mercedes
Fire singes my nerve endings and ricochets through my body as an almighty roar unleashes behind me. It sounds like a demon sent straight from hell, but I know without a shadow of a doubt it isn’t. He’s not quite the devil, but he’s no angel either. It has to be Judge.
I try to peel my face up off the leather when I hear a grunt, followed by a commotion, but I’m too weak. I try to call out for him, needing confirmation it’s going to be okay now, but my lips are too parched, and I have no voice left from screaming.
A muttered curse from his lips is the proof I need, and then all at once my body gives out. Like a thousand-pound weight has been lifted off my shoulders, I have to believe it will be okay. It will be okay because he’s here. That thought fades into oblivion as the adrenaline crashes, my head swims, and I succumb to the blackness.
Something tickles the edges of my consciousness, warmth blooming beneath my skin. I feel hot. Feverish. Like I’m burning alive. Pain skitters across my flesh, dragging me back to the reality I’d hoped to forget. It wasn’t a dream. It wasn’t a nightmare. I was there, and now, it’s too quiet. I’m scared to open my eyes. Scared to move. My heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest, and I’m struggling to draw in a breath when a palm comes to rest on my cheek.
“Mercedes.”
I jolt away from the touch, flopping onto my back, only to let out an agonized cry when I do. The pain. Oh, God, the pain.
My chest caves in, and before I can understand what’s happening, I’m wracked with sobs. Deep, ugly, horrifying sobs.
“Please,” the choked voice beside me whispers. “Open your eyes. Look at me.”
That voice… the sound of my tormentor and my savior has the strangest effect. It wounds me, yet it brings me a small sort of comfort. Because I know for certain, he has reclaimed me. I have traded one monster for another, and I have to believe this is the lesser evil.
“Please,” Judge begs. “Look at me.”
In the span of a few shuddering heartbeats, I manage to open my eyes. Not for him. Never again for him. But when I meet his gaze, the anguish on his face steals my breath away.
“Let me help you,” he says softly. Softer than I’ve ever heard him speak. “I need to roll you back onto your side, so it doesn’t hurt. But that means I need to touch you. Will you let me?”
Another wave of sobbing commences, and it can’t be helped. I don’t have control of my emotions right now. I don’t have control of my own mind.
“Fucking Christ.” Judge reaches out to touch me again, and again, I flinch away, cutting him deep. I can see it in his eyes. He looks so helpless, and he has never been a helpless man.
I have never been a helpless woman either. But right now, I am. I’m so completely fractured beyond repair I don’t know if I’ll ever recover from this.
“Perhaps I should try,” Lois offers in a gentle tone as she steps forward.
For a moment, Judge looks so utterly broken by the idea he shakes his head. But my eyes move to Lois, and I reach my fingers toward her in a silent plea. She’s the only person who hasn’t hurt me here. My only ally in this house.
“Okay,” Judge concedes with a stiff tone. “Please, just get her onto her side.”
Lois sits down beside me, careful and deliberate as she reaches out to touch my arm. “I’m going to help you turn back this way,” she says gently. “Is it okay if I touch your shoulder?”
I nod at her with a jerk of my chin, and she positions her hand beneath my shoulder and slowly rolls me back onto my side, legs curled into my body. My ass stings. My thighs too. But something sticky coats my skin, and I know they must have salved the wounds.
“Is that okay?” she asks.
Again, I nod, grateful for her soothing energy.
“We have some medication that will help,” she tells me. “Will you take it?”
My eyes move back to Judge, and my body shakes as another wave of agony pulses through me.
“I’ll be right here.” He leans forward onto his elbows, his brows pinched in frustration. “I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart. Nobody will touch you. Nobody will ever hurt you like that again.”
My lips part, and I release a strangled sound, working my dry throat until I can force a response from it. “Don’t make promises… you can’t keep.”
Devastation passes over his face, but I’m too far gone to care. When I glance up at Lois, she seems to understand what I need. A promise from someone I can actually trust.
“I’ll stay,” she assures me. “Please, Mercedes, do not worry. I will watch over you. But you need to rest. You need to heal.”
I nod, and she takes the pills from Judge, along with a small cup of water. She has to hold my head up so I can take them, and when I do, my eyes feel heavy within seconds. I’m exhausted, and Lois is right. The only thing I can do now is rest.
Hours blur into each other.Moments of oblivion seem to fracture under seconds of brief clarity when I open my eyes to find Lois kept her word. She hasn’t left. Neither has Judge.
Images of them at my bedside swirl through my mind, getting tangled up somewhere in the brutal nightmares that seem to possess my body and mind. Screams pierce the silence, and I tremble so violently, I wonder if I’m actually dying. When they try to comfort me, it only makes it worse.
“What can we do?” I hear Judge’s voice. And then someone else. The doctor, I think.
“Time.” His words fade away, morphing into something else.
Hellhounds are chasing me through the dark forest, nipping at my heels. My screams seem to echo all around me, the sound reverberating through my chest and down into the ground, only to rumble beneath my feet. I dare a glance over my shoulder, gasping for breath, only to realize they aren’t hounds at all. They are beasts with men’s faces. All the men who have ever hurt me.
Lorenzo De La Rosa, my father. Santiago. Theron. And of course, Judge.