Abby gripped the stem of her glass so hard she thought it was going to crack.
‘Ever since Nick told me, it’s been going round and round in my head. In a low moment I might have asked you if it was a sign that we shouldn’t be married, and boy, did I think that sometimes, but I loved him. I wanted children with Nick precisely because I loved him so much. I would never say I didn’t want to be married to him.’
For a minute Ginny said nothing. Abby glanced across. Her sister-in-law’s gaze was fixed on the London Eye, turning slowly in the dark night sky.
‘All my parents want is grandchildren, and it doesn’t look like they’re going to get them from me,’ she said at last. ‘My brother would be a brilliant dad. He’s from a happy, secure family and that’s what he has always wanted for himself. But you and him together . . . it’s not going to happen, is it? You can’t have children.’
‘So you stirred up trouble,’ said Abby.
‘I made Nick think about what it is he really wants. You, or a family,’ she replied more fiercely.
‘So you think we should split up? You think Nick should find someone new, someone who could give him children? Is that what you’re saying?’
‘What I want is for my brother to be happy,’ she said vehemently.
‘We were happy.’
‘Were you? You had a funny way of showing it.’
Ginny turned and looked at her friend directly.
‘Do you know how long I’ve been single, Abby? Ten years. And for half of that time, I liked it. I loved it. It was my choice. I was independent, my own woman. I could have dinner with friends in Soho every evening, and every night out was full of possibility. And then I woke up one day and realised that I was lonely. I had the job and the flat and the money in the bank to go on holiday with, but all I wanted was to find someone to share it all with. And I’ve not been able to. Whereas you and Nick . . .’ She shook her head. ‘You had what everyone wants. But you were constantly sniping at each other, you never seemed to appreciate one another.’
Abby had to admit she had a point.
‘Things got difficult when we had fertility problems,’ she said more quietly.
‘Or is that just an excuse to cover up the fact that you got married too young and you’d just grown apart?’
‘I love Nick,’ Abby said, clenching her hand into a fist. ‘I love him more than anything. I would do anything, anything for him.’
‘Then why are you getting divorced?’ said Ginny simply.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Abby couldn’t believe the time when she opened her eyes. She pushed herself back on the hotel pillow and glanced at her watch. It was gone 10 a.m. Her dress was in a pile on the bedroom floor and her mouth felt dry and prickly like wool. After Nick left, she’d made sure she wasn’t that woman who sank into a heavy-drinking depression, but last night she had really imbibed too much, she thought, crawling out of bed.
She went into the big living space of the hotel suite, expecting it to be littered with bodies and wine bottles, but Anna was already up and tidying. She had done a good job and the suite almost looked like a show home again.
‘You shouldn’t be doing this, Anna,’ Abby said, picking up an empty Pringles tube, shaking it, then throwing it in a black bin liner. ‘I’m a bad and ungrateful friend.’
‘You are my friend who had way too much to drink last night. How are you feeling?’
‘Felt better. Where is everyone?’ Abby said, looking around.
‘Most people have gone home.’
They remained silent for a moment.
‘So what time do we get thrown out of here?’
‘Eleven, I think. Just enough time for some breakfast.’
‘What have we got? Left-over Magnolia Bakery cupcakes?’
‘Have a look. The butler helpfully left some stuff.’
Still in her pyjamas, Abby shuffled into the kitchen. She put the kettle on for a big pot of tea and poured two large glasses of orange juice, then rustled up some toast and poached eggs.