She lets out a giddy giggle as she peeks through her chubby little fingers and smiles at me, “Yeah!”
“Oh! I can see you peeking!” I say to her playfully. She giggles again and covers her eyes completely. “Alright, baby girl. On three. Ready? One ... Two ... Two and a half ...” she giggles again, and I can’t help but laugh. Pulling her close, I give her a kiss on the side of her head before I finish my countdown, “Three! Open your eyes and look!”
She quickly pulls her hands away and leans so far over that I have to adjust her again to keep her from falling.
“Hi Mama!” she calls out.
I can hear the hay shifting slightly, but there’s no response.
“Hey! She’s talking to you!” I call down sharply. “Say hi!”
The same sound of the rustling needles greets my ears and I sigh.
“Mama’s tired right now, baby girl. She’ll be okay to talk to you tomorrow. Is that alright?”
“Bye Mama!” she calls out again.
I guess it is.
I use my foot to close the lid again, then place her back down onto the grass. I cross my arms loosely over my chest, and laugh as she takes off running, squealing happily at the top of her lungs.
I’ll never replace Jocelyn as my true wife. I can’t; that girl has meant more to me than any other wife before her, and she’s helped me a lot too, in the emotional sense. She showed me that I can be a better person, and when I still feel the need for physical contact, I toss the ladder down into the well so I can fuck her.
It’s probably why she’s still alive, too. Being able to fuck her keeps my mind straight on being a father and not the evil bastard she thinks I am. Maybe one day I’ll let her out permanently, and we can raise this one together, but I doubt it.
If she knew the little collection of wasted wives I kept in my special rooms that she’s so damn scared of, she’d know that being down in the hole is better than being above ground for her.
I can’t help but shake my head and chuckle.
A few years ago, when that couple came back to get their damn dog, she spilled every single fucking secret we had, so of course I had to kill them. I didn’t want to, but she forced my hand. The best part is that no one ever came looking for them. There were no missing persons
alerts in the newspapers or in the media.
I found out later on that they were drifters. They never ended up renting the house next door; they just wanted someone to watch their dog while they found a new place to squat.
Fucking losers.
All of them.
Laura. Vaughn. Eloy.
But I guess it’s safe to say that a wasted fuck leads to waste of children, with the exception of my sweet Joce. God, just thinking about her down in the darkness, dirty, alone, scared, is enough to make me wanna throw the ladder down for a quick fuck, but I can’t today.
I promised my baby girl I’d take her to the zoo, and since I’m damn determined to be a good fucking parent, that’s what we’re gonna do.