Fox lowered his head slightly. “Hannah . . .”
“Be careful of that one,” someone shouted from across the street. “Run while you can, girl.”
Laughter broke out, and Fox knew, before turning to look, that it would be the old-man regulars from Blow the Man Down, smoking outside in their usual spot. The same men he’d made jokes to hundreds of times about his exploits in Seattle. Because it was easier to give them what they wanted. Laugh with them, instead of being laughed at. Make the joke, instead of being the joke. And above all else, don’t let them see how much it all bothered him.
Hannah blinked several times and stepped back from him, as if becoming aware of her surroundings and what had almost happened between them. They’d almost kissed. Or did he imagine that? It was hard to think with the warning signal going off in his head. Jesus, he didn’t want Hannah to hear the kind of garbage that came out of these men’s mouths.
“Who are those guys?” she asked, leaning slightly to look past him.
“No one.” He took her wrist and started walking at a fast clip, glad she’d worn sneakers so she could easily keep up. “Just ignore them. They’re drunk.”
“Your mama didn’t warn you about tomcats like this one? Make sure he shells out the cab fare—”
Hannah skidded to a stop beside Fox, yanking her arm free.
Before he could get ahold of her again, she’d marched halfway across the street.
“Hey, scumbag! How about you shut your mouth?” She jabbed a finger at the leader, and his cigarette froze on the way to his mouth. “Mamas don’t bother warning girls about jerks like yourself, because no one would come within ten feet of you. Smelly old ball sac!”
“Now hold on. It’s just a bit of fun,” offered the man.
“At whose expense?” Hannah shouted, turning in a circle, searching the ground.
Fox, who’d been standing behind her completely dumbfounded, caught between awe and self-disgust, forced his throat to start working. “What are you doing?”
“Looking for something to throw at them,” she explained patiently.
“Okay, how is Piper the one that ended up in jail?” He wrapped a forearm around her waist and shuttled her down the street toward his building, no idea what to say. None. He’d never had anyone stand up for him like that.
And he didn’t want the breathless warmth winging its way into his chest. Would never be ready for the . . . dangerous hope that started to rise to the surface. Hope that if this girl believed he was worth a damn—enough to defend him in the street like this—maybe he was worth the effort?
No. Been there, done that whole dance with optimism. Wanted no part of it.
Right?
“Hannah, you didn’t need to do that. In fact, I wish you hadn’t.”
He really didn’t enjoy the flash of hurt in her eyes. “They were way out of line.”
“No, they weren’t.” He laughed, even though it felt like razor blades. “They know it’s okay to make those jokes to me, because I make them about myself. It’s fine.”
“Yeah, it really sounds fine,” she murmured, allowing Fox to pull her up the stairs of his building, standing silently as he unlocked the door. Part of him, honest to God, wanted to throw his arms around her and say thank you, but no. No, he didn’t need a defender. He’d earned that ridicule, fair and square, hadn’t he?
The last seven months were nothing but an anomaly.
Even if his celibacy, even if the constant of Hannah’s friendship, had made him feel better about himself than he had in years.
They walked into the apartment, and Fox turned on the one and only lamp.
He wanted to shut himself in his bedroom, before the shame of Hannah witnessing that ridicule on the walk home seeped out through his pores and turned visible, but he couldn’t let her hurt expression be the last thing he saw that night. So Fox did what he did best and made light of it. “Have to admit, I’m pretty impressed by your creative use of the term ‘ball sac.’ Ten out of ten.”
Her lips crept up into a smile on one end. “Are we okay?” She wet her lips. “Are you?”
“Everything is fine, Freckles.” He laughed, the empty apartment mocking him. “Get some sleep, huh? See you in the A.M.”
After a moment, she nodded. And that’s where he left her, staring after him thoughtfully, halfway between the kitchen and the front door.
As soon as Fox was alone in his bedroom, he dropped his forehead to the cool door, barely resisting the urge to bash his head against it. Obviously he hadn’t fooled Hannah into thinking he didn’t give a shit about anything. That life was just a series of pleasures and amusements for him. This girl, she saw through it. Worse, she wanted to reach him. But he couldn’t let that happen.