“You aren’t hard to love anymore. You make loving so easy.” She leaned into me and pressed a kiss to the corner of my mouth. When she was finished, she rested her forehead against my chin and stayed there for a while. The happiness was suddenly sucked out of the room as if by a vacuum, and a foreboding feeling replaced it. She didn’t say a single word, but her energy was distinct. We were perfect just a second ago, so what had changed so drastically?
I pulled away so I could look directly into her gaze, see her expression head on. “What is it?”
A forced smile stretched her mouth. “You know me so well, don’t you?”
“You’re my wife.” Now I was used to saying that phrase, letting it roll off my tongue so easily. “I know you pretty damn well.”
“Well…hear me out, alright?”
My eyes narrowed.
She leaned against the wooden headboard and stared at me. “I talked to your father yesterday…”
It took less than a few seconds for the calmness in my blood to evaporate like boiling water. My serenity was washed away and replaced by revulsion. A sense of betrayal swept through me. She told me she would never pull a stunt like that ever again, but she did it anyway. “He could have killed you—”
“I talked to him over the phone,” she said quickly. “I never left the house.”
Relief started in my shoulders then slowly migrated everywhere else. I was still annoyed she’d talked to him at all, but at least the terms were better. I stared at the flames for a few minutes to calm down before I shifted my gaze back to her. “And?”
“And…I think you should talk to him.”
“That’s a joke, right?” The asshole crashed my Christmas party and tossed around a couple of threats. I wasn’t going to call him just so I could hear more—especially on Christmas.
“I understand why you have no motivation to reach out to him. He’s been extremely difficult and doesn’t deserve your patience. But I think you should try anyway.”
“And say what, exactly? What’s the point of this conversation?” I’d tried to be there for my father over the last two years, but he continually disappointed me. That man was so far gone that he would never come back.
“Bury the hatchet.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Let me get this straight. He’s the one who’s been a fucking pain in the ass, but I’m the one who’s supposed to fix everything? He has my number, so if he wanted to apologize, he could do it at any moment. The ball has been in his court for a long time. I’ve been a good son—but he hasn’t been a good father.”
“I know…you shouldn’t have to make any effort. But I think you should.”
“No.” I turned my gaze away.
“Maverick…”
“I took a bullet for that man. I married a stranger for that man. I’ve done everything for that man. If he wants to make things right with me, he needs to do it. He owes me a big fucking apology.”
“I know he does, but he’s stubborn.”
“What a coincidence,” I said sarcastically. “So am I.”
Her hand moved to my arm, and she rubbed it gently. “I don’t know why this is hard for him, but it obviously is. He’s not good at expressing himself or being vulnerable.”
“Neither am I… I am his son.”
“You’re definitely better than he is.”
“That’s debatable.”
“Please talk to him.”
“Why is this so important to you?” I turned back to her.
“Because he’s your father, Maverick. I know you still love him…and I know he loves you.”
My father hadn’t said those words to me since I was a child. I found it unlikely that he loved anyone. Now I wasn’t even sure if he loved my mother since he was willing to rape and kill two innocent women. She never would have wanted that. “He threatened to kill my wife…”
“But he never did.”
“And that makes it okay?” I asked incredulously. “The guy is a psychopath, and you know it.”
“I think he’s just a broken man who needs help…but is too stubborn to ask for it.”
“What do you expect me to do? Go over there and apologize to him?”
“No.”
“Demand him to apologize to me?”
She sighed. “No.”
“Then what am I supposed to do?”
She squeezed my arm. “Forgive him.”
The request was so ridiculous, I wasn’t sure if I’d heard her correctly. “How can you forgive someone when they don’t apologize?”
“You can…as long as you love them.”
Love certainly wasn’t an emotion I felt toward my father. He’d made me so angry for the last few years. He’d disappointed me, hurt me.
“Just talk to him, Maverick. It’s Christmas.”
“So? He didn’t remember my birthday.”
“I’m sure he did, but it was too hard to acknowledge.”
What kind of excuse was that?
“I know it’s a lot to ask. I know you’ve been the victim of his behavior when you shouldn’t be. I know he’s the one who should be on his knees apologizing to you. But you need to be the bigger man and end this. If that’s not enough reason for you, think about me.”