“Dr. Tanner called. She has an opening for today. I went ahead and scheduled it. Is that okay?”
“That is absolutely okay,” I said, giving her a kiss on the cheek.
We were still trying to do the professional distance thing, but I couldn’t help but steal a kiss now and again. She was just too damn tempting to ignore altogether. And she really did look good. There was good color in her cheeks and she had a spring in her step that had been missing for too long. Even her dad noticed the change and had asked me what I did. I told him I was honest with her.
He didn’t understand and I didn’t expect him to. All that mattered was that Bree was happy and healthy. She had been talking about the surgery almost nonstop for days. It was a good sign. Positivity was just as effective as the best medicine in the world. I had seen it first hand on numerous occasions.
“She said she wants to give me a quick exam and if everything looks good, we can schedule the surgery.”
“Awesome. That’s really great.”
“I made you coffee,” she said.
I looked at the counter and smiled. She was really getting the hang of moving around the kitchen. I was purposely late in the mornings, giving her more time to figure things out for herself. I knew that Ellis was confident the surgery would be a success, but I knew there was still a chance it wouldn’t work. I didn’t want Bree to be totally devastated. If she had a little taste of what it could be like to be blind and independent, it would help her through what was sure to be a difficult time.
“Thank you. Do you want me to make some eggs or cut up some fruit for you?”
She shook her head. “I already had toast.”
We moved to the solarium, another part of our morning routine. “Maybe we can go for a swim before we go the appointment.”
“You’re just trying to distract me,” she said.
I laughed. “Busted.”
“A swim would be good. I want to look healthy and alive when we see her. If she thinks I’m sick, she’s going to postpone again.”
I knew it had been hard for her to wait to schedule the surgery, but it was for the best. Now that she was on board with the idea, she was the one pushing to get it done. I had a feeling that’s what Ellis was waiting for. Bree had to want it.
“Will your dad be meeting us there?” I asked.
“No. I didn’t tell him about it.”
“Bree, he’s going to want to know.”
“It’s just another consult. He doesn’t need to be there. I don’t want to get his hopes up if she says we have to delay it again.”
“Okay. It’s your call.”
“Yes, it is, and I cannot tell you how good it feels to be able to say that. No matter what happens, I am going to be different. I’m not going to let myself sink into the pit of despair again.”
I reached for her hand, my thumb stroking over her palm. “You deserve to have a few bad days. You’ve been through a lot.”
“I’ve had plenty of bad days. I think I’m good for a while.”
I mulled over what I wanted to say next. It was something that had been bothering me, but I wasn’t sure how to address it. I wasn’t even sure I had the right to say anything at all.
“Can I ask you something?” I said. “And if you don’t want to talk about it, it’s fine.”
“What is it?”
I took a deep breath. It was too late to turn back now. “Are you still in love with Nate?”
She choked. “What?”
“I understand if you are. You guys were together a long time and maybe the night of the accident was just a fight. You guys might have gotten back together the next day. I just want to know.”
“Luke, no. Nate and I were over long before we ever broke up. I don’t feel like I ever loved him. I never felt for him anything close to what I feel for you. I suppose I care about him a little, but only as a friend. Not even a friend, as an acquaintance. I don’t wish death on him, but I don’t actually want to be his friend. If we bump into one another at a party, I will say hi, but I don’t love him. I really have a hard time liking him at all.”