“Why the hell are you dressed like that?” Eric demanded as he followed her into the kitchen.
Natalie opened a cupboard and paused, feeling regretful. Eric had sounded positively flummoxed. Seeing her with Liam must have been like taking an unexpected blow to the head, though he’d have been confused and protective enough finding her steaming up the windows in a car with any man. Natalie didn’t date that much, after all, and her brother had been the only witness to a few of her unsuccessful attempts during her early and mid-twenties. Eric had been the only witness to her hurt and tears when things had gone bad on those occasions.
He may be annoying at times, but he was her only family. Ever since their mother had died when she was eleven, he’d been both brother and father to her, taking on the full responsibilit
y of an adult and caregiver at age eighteen.
If anyone deserved to scowl at her odd association with Liam Kavanaugh, it was Eric. Knowing that didn’t particularly decrease her annoyance with his presence at the moment, though.
“What do you mean why am I dressed like that?” she asked, her irritation leaking into her voice, despite her former thoughts.
“Your hair, it’s…” He paused and made a comical gesture around his head. “And that top you’re wearing…” He couldn’t seem to come up with the right word to describe it, but he persisted, unfortunately. “It’s not really your style, is it?”
“You can’t expect me to wear a business suit out on a date.”
It took her a few seconds to register the ringing silence.
“You went on a date with Liam Kavanaugh?”
“Sort of,” Natalie replied, already wishing she could take the words back. It was too late now. “Like I said, we’re working on something together.”
“What?”
Natalie exhaled and tossed the bag of coffee onto the counter. She started to tell him about her idea to hire Liam to investigate Derry Kavanaugh’s state of mind on the night of the crash. By the time she’d finished, her brother had gone tight-jawed and pale behind his tan.
“Why didn’t you tell me you planned on doing this?” he asked when she’d finally finished.
“I knew you’d worry about me if I did. I knew you’d tell me not to dwell on the past. But I’m not like you, Eric. I…I can’t seem to let it go.”
“There’s nothing to be gained by this. Nothing,” he said bleakly.
“You’re wrong. I’ve already learned so much more about Derry Kavanaugh. He already seems more real to me, more human.”
“He killed our mother and nearly killed you. You spent a good portion of time in a hospital, thanks to him. You endured constant pain, and countless surgeries and grueling rehabilitation. How much more real can the man be to you?” he asked.
“That was my reality,” Natalie said shakily. “That was ours. I want to know what drove him to do what he did. I have to know.”
“Why can’t you let it rest?” Eric roared.
“Because I’m not resting,” Natalie shot back. “If you’ve found peace by envisioning Derry Kavanaugh as the devil incarnate, then more power to you. I’m not trying to change your mind. Don’t try to change mine.”
Her brother just stood there, looking shocked by her heated outburst. Natalie felt bad for that—how well she knew that Eric wanted her to be happy—but she didn’t feel bad enough to apologize for telling the truth.
She turned and switched on the coffeepot. “What did happen that night our lives changed forever? The question haunts me. Maybe it’s an unhealthy obsession, but I’m not going to stop trying to get all the answers I can find,” she said in a quieter voice.
Eric sighed heavily. “And is it absolutely necessary for you to go on this quest with Liam Kavanaugh?”
Natalie met her brother’s stare slowly. She sensed the double meaning to his question.
“It’s my business, Eric. The only thing I can tell you is that I’m trying to be reasonable. I’ll do my best not to get hurt.”
The hard tilt to Eric’s mouth told her loud and clear he didn’t find her promise very reassuring.
“I haven’t even fully gotten used to Mari being with a Kavanaugh, and she’s just a friend. How do you expect me to react to my only sister seeing one?”
She gave her brother a wry glance before she reached for some coffee mugs.
“Don’t jump to any conclusions about what you saw in the car,” Natalie stated more firmly than she felt. “I’d hardly compare Liam and me to Marc and Mari Kavanaugh. I’m just getting to know him.”