Down in the mine he’d come face-to-face with his feelings of inadequacy. Now to hear he was going to be a father would add the crushing blow that would tear him apart. He would want to be all things to his son or daughter yet believed he could never fill that need.
She dozed on and off until they reached Venice. The sight of the city on water brought back so many memories of the two of them wildly in love, she could hardly bear it. But as she turned to look at him, she could see nothing had changed. Being back in Venice hadn’t brought back one memory for him.
Luna had been a fool to think another miracle could happen like the one when she’d found him alive in Rezana. To expect two miracles had been beyond the realm of credulity.
“What happened when we were in Scuol, Rini? You’re acting different.”
“When we drove past your grandparents’ home, it reminded me that you have no family to rely on once we’re divorced.”
“But I do. Your grandparents have become my family. I adore them.”
“Forgive me for bringing it up.”
“I do.”
Tomorrow after a walk around San Marco Square, she’d suggest they go back home. This trip had turned out to be a painful, torturous idea. On the drive to San Vitano, she’d break the news about the baby.
Luna had already worked out ideas for visitation. Rini would always be welcome at the palazzo when he came. She would stay at the palace, so he’d have free rein to be with his son or daughter for as long as he wanted.
They parked their car and walked to the villa, fighting the crowds. After being shown to their room with a view of the Grand Canal, they left to visit the city. Rini didn’t show the slightest indication that he’d ever been here before.
For the rest of the day, they visited the Doge’s Palace and saw the sights of the Rialto Bridge on a gondola. Later, they went to San Marco Square. Rini bought them pizza at one of the many pizza shops. They sat at one of the tables to watch the world pass by.
While Luna was eating, she felt something drop on her head. She reached up and discovered that a pigeon had left its droppings on her baseball cap. “Oh no!” Her eyes met Rini’s and they both burst into laughter.
“A souvenir for you to remember,” he murmured.
But it would be the last of any souvenirs once they returned home and Rini moved out.
Luna left the cap on. Twilight fell before they finally ended up going back to their room. She was exhausted after losing so much sleep the night before. After washing her cap with hot water and soap, she hung it up to dry. When she came out of the bathroom, she noticed Rini at the window, watching the traffic on the canal.
“There’s no sight like it in the world, is there, Rini?”
At the sound of her voice, he turned to her. He’d removed his cap and sunglasses. “It’s a delightful city. I’m glad you wanted to come here. Have you noticed how hard the gondoliers have to work? They don’t have an air traffic controller to help them navigate. They do it by instinct. It’s fascinating they don’t have more accidents.”
“I’ve never thought about it, but you’re right.” She took a deep breath. “What do you want to do tonight?”
“That’s up to you, Luna.”
“In that case, I’d like to stay in. The pizza filled me up and I have to admit I’m tired.”
“Then that’s what we’ll do. Why don’t you get ready for bed while I watch the tour of Venice on TV?”
“Good idea.”
Relieved he didn’t want to go anywhere, she showered and changed into her nightgown. At last, she was able to climb under the covers. Rini turned on the TV and lay on top of the bedspread still dressed. She’d felt he’d been having a good time, too, but she couldn’t allow this to go on.
Luna gripped the sheet to keep from reaching out to him. No doubt about it. Tomorrow she’d tell him she wanted to go home and explain she was pregnant. For now, she was truly exhausted and in emotional agony. “Good night, Rini.”
“Get a good sleep, Luna.”
* * *
The video bored Rini. All he could think of was his breathtaking wife lying asleep next to him. Her gilt hair lighted by the TV drew him like a beacon. He wanted to plunge his hands into the silky strands and kiss the daylights out of her.
He’d promised himself that during this trip he wouldn’t let anything break down his resolve to keep his distance from the woman he adored. But he knew he couldn’t keep that promise much longer. Tomorrow they’d have to go home. He couldn’t take being with her like this without making love to her. That would be beyond cruel when he’d determined to divorce her.
Frustrated beyond endurance, he shut off the TV and turned on the radio. He could only make out the news in bits and pieces. After changing it to music, he lay back on his side away from her, still dressed in his shorts and T-shirt.