I thought about her invitation. Was I going to leave, or wasn’t I? I’d like to get to know her more. What would it be like to have a real girlfriend? How much could I confide in her? I was always jealous of the girls at school who hung out together. They seemed to move in their own world, speak their own language, and have experiences I could only imagine. I had wanted to be part of all that back then, and I certainly wanted something like it now. The only time I had ever been out where people my age were enjoying themselves was when I was on a training session with Ava. The truth was, none of us had anything remotely resembling a social life. Could I? Would it be unfair, even dangerous, for Julia to be my friend?
“Well?” she asked when a long moment of silence had passed. “Do you have intentions of getting someone to ask you out? Is that why you’re hesitating?”
“No, no. Yes,” I said impulsively. “I’d love to go out with you.”
“Great. I’ll pick you up at seven. You’ll love this place. Great food, great music. It’s a happening place.”
“You know I’m technically not of drinking age.”
“Don’t worry about it. We’ll hang in the restaurant section. No one checks much there. I’ll buy the drinks.”
“Okay, thanks.”
Mrs. Winston looked at me when I returned. She would never think of herself as a busybody. I knew she was simply concerned about me.
“That was your great-niece, Julia. I met her at the hospital.”
“Oh, yes. She’s a delightful young lady.”
“She and I are going out this Saturday night.”
“That’s wonderful,” she said. I couldn’t tell if she was disappointed or relieved that it wasn’t Liam who had called for a date.
“I wish I had the energy to go out and party on weekends,” Mr. Brady said. “Too often, I have to work on Saturdays.”
“And too often, you imbibe with your prospective customers,” Mrs. Winston said.
He started to protest and then stopped and admitted that she had a point. I left them talking about the benefits and dangers of alcohol. Mrs. Winston was already well into the most popular beverages in the John Quincy Adams White House. It brought a smile to my face as I left to do what I had promised and stopped in to see Jim after dinner.
“I guess I didn’t give you such a great introduction to Quincy, Massachusetts,” he said, still feeling sorry for himself and still trying to get me to say kind things.
“I never asked for that. You were very kind to worry about me and offer to take me home, Jim. Let’s leave it at that. Get back on your feet, and go back to work.”
He nodded, looked down for a moment, and then raised his head slowly. “Can I make a confession?
” he asked.
“It’s not necessary,” I told him.
“But I’d like to be honest. Somehow, when I’m in your presence, I feel a greater need to be so. Not that I’m a dishonest person ordinarily,” he quickly added.
“Okay, what is it?”
“I pretended to be leaving the mall and just happen to see you. I was there much earlier, watching you and Naomi. I saw her leave you, and that was when I planned how I would supposedly luckily spot you.”
I nodded softly. “I’m flattered,” I said. He started to smile. “But it’s only fair to tell you that I’m not looking for a romantic involvement right now. I’ve just come off a very hard disappointment. I need time and space. I’m not even sure I’m going to stay here.”
His face, even his bruises, lost color instantly. “Why not?” he practically whined. “You have a great new job, and I heard from Mrs. Winston how much Mr. Dolan likes you already. Why would you consider leaving?”
“It’s complicated,” I said. “For now, I appreciate your friendship, but let’s not think of it as much more.”
He swallowed his disappointment so hard that it made his Adam’s apple bounce, but I thought I had to say what I had said. I didn’t want to hurt or disappoint someone as vulnerable as he was. Looking at him, all banged up and already head over heels about me, I couldn’t help thinking what an easy target he would be for Ava or even for me if I were doing what Daddy expected of me. Now that I was thinking about that in relation to him, I also thought about the young men who had introduced themselves to me at Dolan Plumbing Supply. All of them were prime prey. They looked as if they would be willing to fall into any trap I had set. Why was it so easy?
I had always thought Ava was joking when she told me that we had a special aroma that excited the lust in men.
“We almost don’t have to be sexy and attractive,” she had said. “Not that we aren’t.”
“I don’t smell anything different about you, nor did I smell anything different about Brianna,” I had told her.