She looked away and stared out the window. Then she glanced up at the portrait again, looking as if she were hearing her husband’s voice.
“I should send you right back,” she finally said. She said it like a thought aloud.
“I will understand,” I said, a little too quickly.
She turned back to me with a look of surprise. “You would, wouldn’t you? You’d understand, and you would accept your pathetic fate. You’d even go to church and give thanks.”
“Yes,” I said. “I would.”
She slapped the desk and leaned forward. “Damn you. Don’t you see how that would be a defeat, a retreat? Have you no spunk at all? Isn’t any of my blood flowing through your simple brain? Where is your ambition, your hope for yourself? Don’t you see the opportunity for yourself here? You can’t be that stupid.”
“I am not stupid.”
“No. Your teacher thinks you’re rather bright, actually. I’ve already been told.” She sat back again. “Well, I’m not sending you back,” she said after a moment. “First, Edward would be very upset, and I don’t want to do anything to hurt his potential recuperation. If you have any feelings, you would think of that, too.”
“I do. I want to stay to help him.”
“Help him,” she muttered. She looked out the window again, thought for a few moments, and then turned back to me. “All right, I’m going to let you stay, and I’m going to do more to help you fit in here. I’m going to get you a better wardrobe and not just those hand-me-downs from Sophia. I’m going to arrange for your safe delivery to your school and return. No more buses and accepting rides from boys. You won’t have to do any more household duties.
“The whole community knows now that you’re my niece, so there’s no point in pretending anything else, but that means you have even more responsibility to protect my good name and my reputation. If you behave, help, I’ll see to it that you’re well provided for, especially if you are capable of attending college. In short, I’ll mak
e you into a norteamericana. And I will continue to send something to your grandmother periodically to keep her from starving or dying in the muddy street.”
Before I could even think to say thank you, she added something more.
“But I want you to do something for me.”
“What, Tía Isabela? What can I possibly do for you?”
“Not for me so much as for Edward, I suppose,” she said.
“Edward?”
“I want you to tell me if his friendship with this Jesse is more than just a friendship. I’m worried about him.”
I was stunned for a moment. “You mean you want me to spy on Edward?”
“And you can spy on Sophia, too. Let me know if she does anything wrong. We might as well make full use of your goody-goody innocence.”
I didn’t know what to say. I was surprised about Edward and Jesse, but to betray them, betray Edward, and then to be a tattletale on Sophia, too? Didn’t she hate me enough already?
“I would not like to be…”
“Don’t pretend any discomfort about it, Delia. I saw the expression on your face when I asked you about Edward and Jesse before. You either saw something or sensed it, too. Well?”
“They are friends. They…”
“I have spoken my piece,” she said, standing. “You know what I want, and you know I am going to reward you. Just be like you really are, like everyone else, like both your mother and me, selfish, and you’ll be just fine. I’ve got other things to do,” she added, and started out of the office. At the door, she paused. “This weekend, we’ll go shopping for your clothes.”
“This weekend?”
“Yes, this weekend. Must I repeat everything?”
“I was…invited to a fiesta, a birthday party my friend Ignacio’s family is having for his sister. I would like to attend Saturday night,” I said
“Why?” she asked, stepping back toward me. “Why do you want to continue to have anything to do with riffraff? Don’t you want to mix with people from higher-class homes, wealth?”
“They are my people,” I said. “They are not riffraff.”