Why was she calling me Noble? I stepped up to the grave.
I will never forget that moment. The scream that began inside me nearly blew out my eardrums. because I did not utter it. I was too shocked, too frightened. Nothing that had happened to inc before and nothing that has happened to me since will ever clap thunder as loud, singe the sky with fire as hot and bright, burn through my heart or capture and hold my breath as long as this.
There in the grave lay my brother. Noble... dressed in my clothes, wearing my shoes and my amulet.
She had somehow taken it off me during the night, and it wasn't until that very moment that I noticed I was wearing his talisman instead of my own. In my clothes, with a bonnet on his head that I hadn't worn for years, he truly did look like me. I did feel like I was gazing down at myself.
"Good-bye. Celeste," Mommy whispered. "Now you must join our ancestors and walk with them. You must have become so worthy in their eyes. I can be only happy for you for that, and of course, now you will keep Daddy company. How lonely he must have been to let this happen to you."
She turned to me and smiled softly.
"Your brother wants to say good-bye, too." she said, looking at me. "Go on, Noble," she urged. "Don't be afraid. She can hear you for a little while longer. Go on."
I gazed down at him and then at her. She was still smiling and waiting. What was I supposed to say? "Mommy--"
"Just say good-bye to your sister. Noble. Sleep well, Go on. Say it," she instructed.
I looked at my brother, and then I muttered a good-bye. Mommy opened her Bible and began to read.
"The Lord is my shepherd..."
I listened, unable to move, practically unable to breathe. Every time I looked down at him. I grew dizzy. The clouds above seemed to spin and spin, dropping lower and lower, coming at me. Her voice droned on. I could hear the wind in the trees. The clouds continued to drop.
Suddenly, all was black.
I awoke in my bed, or what I thought was my bed. When I gazed around. I realized I was in Noble's bed. My head felt different. too. I brought my hands to it and quickly realized that my hair had been cut. Then I looked down at myself and saw I was wearing Noble's shirt and pants. I sat up quickly, and just as I did. Mommy appeared in the doorway, a tray in her hands. This time it had a cup of herbal tea on it and two pieces of toast with her homemade blueberry jam.
"Now, there you are," she said setting the tray down on the nightstand and then pulling a chair up to the bed. "Sit up. Noble," she said and fixed the pillow behind me.
"Mommy, why am I wearing Noble's clothing, and why did you cut my hair?" I asked.
"She was very close to them. Noble," she replied instead of answering me. "I knew in my heart she would be taken. That's why they appeared to her so soon. We should be grateful for the time we had with her. No one else will understand. I know that. You know how these people around us can be. It has to be our secret, my darling. Our secret."
"But... I'm Celeste." I said.
"No. no. You must be your brother forever and ever now. It's what they want, what they expect. Every day you will understand more and more. You will hear the spirits telling you what I am telling you. You will hear them just as I do. You will know I am right.
"If you betray them, if you disobey, the evil spirits will take you as well, but you will not be with your father, for you failed to protect your brother's spirit, so you must take his spirit into you. You must be his spirit. Noble must not be gone," she added. "It wasn't his time. It was Celeste's time. That's
what we now know."
She reached for the tray.
"Eat and drink some tea," she said, smiling lovingly.
"I need you to be strong again. We have much to do together, Noble."
I stared at her, but she continued to smile.
"I will never again call you anything but Noble, and you must never again answer to any other name. To abandon this destiny is to condemn yourself to the darkness and the fire, to be forever in a place where there is no love, no hope. Ugly in, beauty out, forever and ever," she said. "Go on, eat, sip your tea, get well, and then we will begin."
Begin what? I wondered,
It was as if she could read my thoughts.
"Begin your rebirth," she said and rose slowly. "We'll have to contend with the outsiders for a while. They would never be able to understand us, so we must tell them things they will be able to understand. After that they'll be gone from our lives, and we will be able to continue, just as always." she said, smiling, and continued walking toward the doorway.
She turned back to me, her smile deeper, brighter. "Guess what I've done." she said. "To cheer you up." I couldn't speak. All I did was shake my head.