"She doesn't," she said sharply.
"She will," I replied, now holding my eyes on her.
"I hope so," she relented, "Should I go back to say goodbye to her?"
"Maybe not Maybe it's best you just leave quietly. She's in good hands. As you know. I have a wonderful staff here, and we don't like to see the families make the patients feel abandoned in any way."
"I'm not doing that." she retorted sharply.
"No, of course not, but someone who is already suffering with misconceptions, self-deprecation, loss of identity..."
"Yes. well. I suppose you are right. You do know more than I do." she said, standing.
"I'll walk you out." I said.
"It's a very pretty place. I mean, where it's located, those willow trees, the river nearby, the grounds."
"Nature is a true healer," I said.
"If that were true, you'd think the ocean would have been that for her. We lived right on the beach."
"It held other connotations, other meanings for her, perhaps."
"Her father crashed in the ocean, but we never talked about that." she said. nodding. "Oh, this is all so complicated. It makes me spin."
"Don't worry. We'll sort it out," I said "Did you want to see the rest of the clinic, our facilities?"
"No," she said quickly. 'I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound disinterested, but seeing all these disturbed people, especially the younger ones, depresses me. I don't know how you do this sort of work. Doctor. How do you do it?"
"You think about helping them, seeing them walk out of here to be productive people again, and that's how you do it." I said.
I walked out with her to the waiting limousine. The moment the driver saw her, he jumped and rushed around to open the door for her. She had that sort of aura about her continuously. commanding.
"This isn't easy for me." she said at the car, looking back at the clinic and taking a deep breath. "She's my only child. Aside from poor Linden, of course."
"I understand," I said.
"I keep thinking about how happy we all were when our lives were chaotic, when we were moving from naval base to naval base, following my husband in his career, never really having any roots. They used to salute each other, you know," she said. "With two fingers. She did it when she was only two, and he thought it was so funny and cute that he never forgot and always did it the same way."
I smiled.
She was really crying now, and I thought that under the shell she had created for herself in order, perhaps, to survive in the world she had found herself living in now, she still had a very warm, loving other self. desperately frying to be heard. When we're honest about our own emotions, we have the best chance for happiness, Willow. Always remember that.
I squeezed her hand gently.
She looked at me one more time and in a whisper said. "Take care of my baby"
Then she got into that luxurious, shiny black limousine with its tinted windows. I actually felt sorry for her. She looked shut up, locked away in there. The windows reflected me and the clinic. I no longer saw her, and moments later she was driven away.
I watched her go, and then I turned back to my clinic and walked with determined steps to attack whatever monster resided in your mother's troubled mind.
2
A Little Footnote
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After her admittance your mother was shown to