“Bye, Mommy,” Sadie jumps into my arms, kissing my cheek.
“Be sure to wear your hat,” I tell her as she runs out the door.
The cabin is quiet for a moment, and it’s almost scary. I’m startled when Ashton runs his finger over the back of my neck.
He chuckles. “Jumpy?”
“A little.”
“Grab your coat. We’re going to take a walk.”
I nod, slip on my boots, and put on my jacket. Even though our hands are covered with gloves, we hold hands. Ashton guides us to the other side of the property to a small trail. The snow crunches beneath our feet.
“Are you ready for a week-long road game trip?” I ask him.
“Yes and no. I love road games, but I hate them at the same time.” He chuckles as we continue up the trail.
“Do you ever get tired of traveling? I mean, you’re on a plane or a bus more than anything, right?”
“Yeah, but I enjoy it.” He stops walking. “I love traveling, even if I spend more time getting there than at the place itself. I only ever get tired of it when I haven’t seen Reed in a few days.”
“I can understand that.” I nod.
We’re almost to the top of the hill. We haven’t said anything more. I look at the bare trees, and the stunning, almost blinding, white snow.
Be crazy.
Tiff’s words strike me at that moment, making me realize that Ashton is here. He’s here with me. He isn’t running away. He’s not making fun of my insane behavior. He’s here, and he does treat Sadie like his own.
“I know that this might be a little forward,” I blurt out. “But Sadie’s seventh birthday is coming up soon. I never do anything big for her, but the family will all be there. I was hoping, maybe, if you’re in town, you would like to come too?” I shrug, trying to act like it isn’t a big deal.
He laughs, turning to me. “It’s forward to ask me to a little girl’s birthday party?” he teases me. “I’ll be there.”
“Well, her birthday is about a month away still, and I know that we’re going slow, but,” I can’t believe I’m about to say this, “if we’re still together than, I would like to tell Sadie.”
He smiles. “So, basically, you want me there as a birthday present for her?”
I slap his shoulder, making him laugh harder. “No. I just mean we tell her around that time.” I loop my arm with his. “I really think it’s awesome how you and Brooke wait until you’re serious with someone before telling Reed. I want to be sure too. She’s young, and her feelings will always come first for me. I don’t want to bring a guy into her life and then rip him away.”
“That’s the trouble, isn’t it? Our kids, and even us, getting attached and then something happening and we’re not around anymore. I don’t know how anyone could walk away from a child, even if it’s not theirs.”
I nod, understanding what he means. “I can’t imagine either. I need to thank you, for going slow, I mean. I don’t think that many guys in their twenties would give a basket case like me a chance.”
“Why do you think that, Lex? Explain that to me.” He steps back, but holds my hips.
“Ashton.” I need to tell him. If I want this, or even move on a little, I need to say it. “I was a widow at twenty-three. Even though I have my parents and Tiff, I’ve pretty much raised Sadie on my own. I’ve barely dated or even conversed with the opposite sex in almost seven years. And here you stand, being, you know, amazing. You’re a great dad, a caring friend, and an arrogant jerk on the ice. Now, you’re going slow with me.” I step closer to him. “And I can’t think of a better person to be in my life. Of course, it helps that Jax Godwin is your best friend.”
“You feel older than you really are.” He nods, ignoring my Jax comment. “Makes sense, I guess, except that you are missing one key fact. All of those things have made you into a wonderful mom who is capable of being independent at the same time. I wasn’t always this way, you know. Amazing and great and caring, as you say. I had to grow up quick. I was twenty when Reed was born, so I sort of get what you mean. Look more at where you are now than at everything that happened to get you here. You can look at everything you have now and still remember what you lost.”
“Well, I think the fresh air has made you wiser. But, thank you. I know you’re right. I can’t promise that I might not flip out again, but I want to try. And I want to try with you.” I softly kiss his lips.
When he pulls away, his sexy grin is there. “Try all you want with me, or whatever you want,” he teases. “I’m right here, and I can promise I always will be.”
“Let’s go back to the cabin.” I can see the fog from my breath as it speeds up. “I want to spend some time alone with you.”
We both run back up to the cabin, knowing that everyone will be back soon. Ashton bursts through the door, and we go right for my room. He shuts the door, and we pull off our jackets, gloves, and boots. Ashton’s lips are on mine, and he pushes me to the bed, laying me on my back.
“Wait.” I put my hand on his chest, making him stand.