But I push it all away and only think about Jimmy. Just Jimmy. I think about how we had sex. And how he kissed me. And our perfect date in the Mighty Minions forest.
I think about how his cocks filled me up and how we were spinning around, making new stars.
I come. It’s not spectacular and it’s not even fun. But I come and a few seconds later, so does the boy.
I feel so disgusting. So gross I just want to take a shower. I can’t even look at him. I just want to get out of this room, go find Jimmy, and get out of this filthy place as fast as I can.
This experience will probably scar me for the rest of my life but the alternative is worse.
The alternative is being stuck here with this boy and being separated from Jimmy forever.
I want to cry and scream and kill something right now. I hate people. I hate them so much. Why do they think they get to decide my fate? Why do they think they get to decide anyone’s fate but their own? It’s not fair and it sucks.
“Are you OK?” the boy asks.
“Don’t talk to me.”
He doesn’t say another word and after a few minutes, we get ourselves together and stand up.
Even though I still feel dirty, I also feel better. I feel more in control. I feel strong and able to think straight.
I hate myself for this. I hate what I am. I hate that I’ve been genetically engineered for sex.
He says, “My name is—”
“Shut up,” I say. “Just shut up. I don’t give two flying fucks what your name is, OK? Just… stand there and be quiet while I think of a way out of this mess!”
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE – JIMMY
Veila slaps me and several cyborg guards come rushing over and pull me away from her.
Bitch. She is such a fucking bitch.
Veila brings a single fingertip up to the spit on her cheek and wipes it away. One of the borgs hands her a handkerchief. She wipes her fingertip on it and hands it back.
“You won’t get far with that attitude, Jimmy.”
“Fuck you,” I say. “You are the most disgusting creature I’ve ever met, you know that?”
“Oh, please,” she says, walking back over to her drink to take a sip. “You live with millions of disgusting creatures so you don’t get to play the self-righteous martyr with me.”
“I take it you’ve never been there, then?”
“As if I’d lower myself.”
“As if we’d ever let you board,” I say, shrugging off the two guards holding me.
She sucks in a deep breath through her nose, sets her glass down, and pretends to smooth out a wrinkle in her gown. “You can’t fight this. And Delphi can’t fight her fate either.”
“Watch us.”
“As long as I’m in the room I’ll be the only thing you’ll see.”
“Let’s test that out. Bring Delphi back here.”
Veila laughs. “No, I don’t think so. I was willing to accommodate you if you just went along with the program, but after that little display I’ve changed my mind. You’re never going to see her again. She and the boy will be shipped out in a few spins and taken to the other facility. There she will become pregnant and give birth to her first set of twins. Then we’ll breed her again, and again, and again until she is an old woman.”
Rage. I feel nothing but rage.
She sits down at the table and leans back in her chair. “Too bad. Things could’ve gone a lot different.”
“As long as I did everything you told me too, right?”
“Exactly. It’s not like it’s torture. You have needs, Jimmy. Daily needs. Why not let me help with those needs?”
“Um… probably because you disgust me. And my hand can do a better job.”
She closes her eyes for a prolonged moment, then opens them again. “OK. I see you’re not going to assimilate unless I convince you. So let me convince you.”
“I won’t change my mind, believe me.”
“Hear me out for a moment, hmm?”
I stare at her, wondering where this bitch gets her balls. Then I see something moving over in a flower arrangement in the corner of the room.
Flicka! I totally forgot about her!
There’s a moment of elation. A single moment of me thinking this has got to be some kind of divine intervention. That maybe we have a chance.
Clearly Veila has no idea that I brought Delphi’s bot onto the ship. So yeah, I’m stuck and Delphi’s stuck, but one of us is free.
But then I wonder… what could one single dragonbee bot really do when there’s at least a dozen guards in here and so many more outside this door?
And the elation fades as quick as it appeared.
Nothing. The answer to that question is nothing.
“Should I take your silence as a yes?”