I can’t help it. A laugh bursts from my mouth. This is the Ezra I know.
“Just the usual?” I shake my head. “You’re a walking disaster, I swear to God. Ezra, this is my boyfriend, Jasper. Jasper, this is my hopeless best friend, Ezra. He fucks up a lot.”
Ezra’s eyes widen. “Boyfriend? You got yourself a real-life relationship thingy?”
“I did. Turns out I’m relationship material after all.”
“I’m happy for you. He’s hot. Any chance of a—”
I know what he’s going to say. “Not on your goddamn life.” No threesomes. Never. Jasper is mine.
“Chance of what?” Jasper asks.
“I’m not sharing you.”
Jasper’s cheeks pinken, and I love it. I lean in to kiss one of them just to feel the heat under my lips.
Ezra puts his hands up. “All good. It’s probably about time we had boundaries. So, you know, I don’t unknowingly cross them again?”
I let out a loud sigh. “Let’s go out and get coffee and breakfast. I think this conversation is long overdue.”
“I’m in.” Ezra bounds down the steps, while I turn to Jasper.
I squeeze his hand. “You coming?”
He glances between us both and then looks down at his feet. “You go. You two have a lot to get through, and I wouldn’t want to be in the way.”
“You’re never in the way.”
“Go have your moment. Text me later?”
“You bet.”
I touch my lips to his but pull away when we hear, “Aww.”
I glare at Ezra.
“What?” he asks innocently. “You two look happy and cute. You almost make me want one of those relationship thingies.”
“If you’re calling it a thingy and not just a relationship, you shouldn’t have one.”
He shoves me as we walk toward his car. “Hey, I said almost.”
I give Jasper a wave as we go our separate ways and get into Ezra’s car with a pit of dread in my stomach. This has been a long time coming, and I’ve been avoiding it up until now.
“Okay, let’s get all this awkward out of the way,” Ezra says. The car’s running, but he sits back in his seat and turns to me. “I’m sorry I had sex with your brother last summer.”
I laugh. “Are you though?”
“I am. And I know this is no excuse, but we were both drunk, you were adamant we were never going to sleep together again, he was there, and you and I had never had any rules before, so … I dunno. I didn’t see how it was any different to what we usually did. In retrospect, I understand now how it was wrong. As you know, I’m not much of a think before I act kind of guy.”
“Understatement. And I know I don’t have a right to be angry at it other than bro-code, and bro-code is so—”
“Not us.”
“It’s really not. Maybe it hurt because I think somewhere deep down I thought you and I would actually end up together, but I also know, logically, that would never, ever happen.”
“Me? Settle down? You might be willing to drink that Kool-Aid, but hell no. Fuck no. No, no, no, no, no.”
“Yeah, I know that now. And I mean, Jasper’s great. I, umm, I think I’m in love with him? But I haven’t told him, so keep your mouth shut.”
Ezra wipes a fake tear away. “Aww, my little boy is all grown up.”
It’s my turn to shove him. “Shut up and drive. I need coffee.”
“Just point me in the right direction.”
I guide him toward Bean There near campus because it’s the weekend, so it shouldn’t be busy, and they have the best coffee.
Having breakfast with Ezra, laughing with him, and being us again puts into perspective that what we’ve always had is only friendship. It’s not the same as when I’m with Jasper and he gives me that sense of being the only one in the universe. When I’m with Jasper, the rest of the world doesn’t matter.
When I’m with Ezra, I’m still thinking about what’s going on at home.
Jasper’s my escape. Ezra is … exhausting. Fun, but exhausting.
“Wait, let me get this straight. Someone in a bar told you Boston sucks, you took a swing, and then Anton Hayes, who plays for Philadelphia, stepped in and saved you like you’re some damsel in distress?”
“Fuck off. I ain’t no damsel. But yes.”
“Anton Hayes. The guy you get into fights with constantly on the ice because you both have the biggest egos in the NHL.”
“Yep.”
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why would Anton save you from getting your ass kicked? He hates you.” Wait … “He’s not the one you—”
“No,” he says quickly. Too quickly. He clears his throat. “Okay, fine, but like, the feeling’s mutual. We hate each other, and then he jumps in front of angry fans like some knight in shining armor. What was I supposed to do?”
“Uh, not have sex with him? Given him a free shot on the ice next season?”