Not surprising, even though it’s our day off, when I run to the team gym, a few guys are milling about.
As soon as I walk in, the reps stop. They all stare at me. The room is silent.
My gaze finds Jacobs’s scowling face.
“Aren’t I being punished enough already?”
Jacobs folds his arms. “Are you even going to apologize?”
He steps toward me. For a minute, I think he might take a swing, but I don’t back down.
“He was hassling Zach, okay? The reason Zach even goes to this school now is because of what that asshole did to him.”
Jacobs falters. “Because he’s gay?”
“Zach and my brother won’t tell me the full story. All I know is Morris deserved it, and I’m not sorry. Am I sorry we lost? Fuck yes. Am I sorry I messed with the team’s psyche? Of fucking course. But I’m not the only player out on that ice, and I’m not sorry for standing up for something and someone I believe in.”
The room is still silent.
“I’ll apologize to everyone at practice again tomorrow, and if you need to ice me out, then fine. If you want me to step down as captain, I’ll do it.”
Jacobs rolls his eyes. “Don’t be so dramatic. You’re still our captain. Everyone’s just pissed you went rogue.”
“You should’ve told us,” Beck says. “Maybe we all could’ve taken a shot and then gotten on with the game.”
I grin. “I’m not worried about our game.”
“But the curse!” Cohen says.
“Fuck the curse. We got this.”
Now if only I could make myself believe it with the same confidence.
After I work out, I’m still nowhere near exhausted or satisfied, so I run back to my dorm, shower, change, and then head for the library. I need to find a student handbook or school bylaws that will tell me it’s okay to fuck my TA.
But first, a detour to the dining hall for breakfast. And coffee.
If I have to actually read something today, I’m gonna need caffeine so I can focus and keep my thoughts from drifting to a certain nerdy—
As if thinking about Zach for the millionth time in twelve hours causes him to appear, I spot him ahead of me in line for food.
I can’t help smiling.
He’s in sweats, an old T-shirt, and his black hair is sticking up at weird angles like he just got out of bed.
I wonder if he did.
I wonder if he spent most of the night unable to sleep because of an uncomfortable ache between his legs like me.
Normally, I don’t use my status at this school to cut lines, but I’m a desperate man.
Zach’s staring off into the distance, and at first I think he’s zoned out, but as I get closer, I realize he’s focused on a couple at a table by the windows. He’s probably psychoanalyzing them and their relationship based on their body language.
I approach the guy behind Zach and point in front of him in question.
He lets me in. I mouth a thanks.
Zach’s so out of it, he hasn’t acknowledged my presence yet.
I move closer so I’m right near his ear. “You look tired. Long, lonely night?”
He jumps about a foot in the air. “Fucking hell!”
I burst out laughing. “Good morning to you too.”
“What are you doing? How long have you been there?” His gaze darts around the room, and his face tinges that beautiful pink, probably because his outburst caught some people’s attention.
“You were kinda out of it.”
“Your fault,” he mutters.
I smile. “Good. At least I know I’m not the only one who suffered last night. You got plans for today?”
“I do.”
I gasp. “Without me?”
“I … I’m hanging out with Ray. She messaged me, and—”
I chuckle. “You’re allowed to make friends, Zach. Seth would be so proud.”
“You’re teasing again.”
I pinch my thumb and forefinger together. “Little bit.”
We reach the front of the line, and all Zach grabs is a muffin.
“That’s it? That’s not a substantial breakfast.”
“Okay, Mom. Us non-athletic people don’t need much food. I also need to run. Metaphorically, that is. Not … literally. Please don’t ever ask me to go running.”
I snort. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”
“Anyway, I have to go. I’m late to meet Ray.”
“Have fun.”
“You too.”
I stack my plates high, my stomach rumbling after my workout this morning, but as soon as I’ve shoveled it all into my mouth, I’m out the door again.
I’m on a mission.
In the three years I’ve been at this school, I can honestly say I’ve been to the library maybe twice.
Most of the course material is online, so there’s been no need.
I don’t even know where to find what I’m looking for.
And who knew libraries were so … big.
I would ask for help, but I don’t really want to put it out there that I’m trying to find a way to have sex with my TA and not get in trouble.