“Of course I’m sad,” I replied. “I want a baby.”
“Then, I don’t get it. Why are you doing this?” he asked.
“Because it would be irresponsible not to. I won’t give birth to another Varasso. I can’t. What would life be for me and my baby?” I rubbed my stomach. “I could barely date a Varasso. I certainly cannot raise one.”
“What if you said it wasn’t Sandro’s?” Ricky asked.
“If he ever asked for a DNA test, I would look like a bad parent, and he could use it as leverage to take the baby from me,” I replied.
Ricky shook his head. “Alessandro would never do that to you. He loves you way too much. He would never hurt you like that.”
“I knew you would defend him. I almost didn’t tell you about this, you know?” I poured myself a cup of coffee, and when I brought the cup to my lips, Ricky held out his hand. “No!”
“What?” I asked with wide eyes.
“Caffeine, baby. No-go, sis.”
“What does it matter? I’m getting an abortion today,” I said. I tried to ignore him, but I couldn’t bring myself to drink the cup. I’d already decided that I wasn’t keeping the baby, but it suddenly felt immoral. “I hate you for ruining coffee for me.”
“How did I do it? You were the one who decided to go all who-needs-protection with Sandro. I didn’t force you to do that,” Ricky replied.
“You know what, if you’re going to be all logical lawyerly, you can just go,” I hissed, and Ricky laughed. I begrudgingly grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and drank it. “Are you happy?”
“I didn’t make you do that, either,” he said, “but yes.”
The doorknob to my front door started to rattle, and Ricky immediately jumped up. He reached for his gun, and for a minute, I fell right in line. Spending a few weeks with the Varassos rots the mind.
The door opened, and Sasha walked in, dropping her keys into her pocket. “Um, hi.”
Ricky looked over his shoulder. “You could have told me other people have keys to your apartment.”
I scrunched up my nose. “I don’t have to tell you everything.”
Sasha was wearing an understated outfit of jeans and a tucked-in tank top with white heels. She walked over to me and pulled me into a hug. “Oh, honey. I’m here for you. It’s okay.”
I plied us apart with a laugh, scratching her cheek lovingly. “I’m okay. My brother’s here. Ricky, this is Sasha. Sasha, Ricky.”
Sasha raised an eyebrow and held out her hand. “Hello. I’ve heard lots about you.”
Ricky took it and shook it gently. “And I, you, mostly from movies, but a little bit from my sister, I guess.”
Sasha let out a fake giggle. “All good, I hope.”
“Very good. I see you now, and I can see what she’s a fan,” Ricky replied, still with her hand clasped in his.
“Um, whatever this is,” I motioned to them. “Stop it. Stop. It. Please.”
Sasha pulled her hand free and walked over to the coffee pot. “Oh, is this fresh.”
“Yes, and please drink it. Smokey the Bear won’t let me,” I replied.
“I mean, you are pregnant.” She picked up the mug of mine with the fresh cup I’d just poured and helped herself.
“I’m aborting!” I bellowed while Ricky stared at me with a shit-eating grin.
“When are you going?” Sasha asked.
“The clinic opens at eight,” I replied. “I want to be there, like, right when it opens. I want to get this over with.” I checked the clock hanging above my front door and noticed it was quarter to eight already. “We actually should be leaving, Ricky.”