“Can I what?”
“Can you make me feel good?”
13
Kelly
I couldn’t believe I’d just asked him that. It was so forward, so wanton. But right then, I didn’t care. I felt like everything in my life was about to collapse, to be destroyed, and before that happened I wanted to actually feel what I’d been dreaming about ever since that first kiss: being with him like this. Being with him in every way possible.
I wanted to not be me, Kelly Carr, a virgin who’d never experienced anything close to ecstasy.
I wanted to connect to him, really connect, and on every single level. Already, he’d given me pleasure like nothing I’d ever felt. And I wanted more. Needed more. Craved it like my next breath.
Even if it frightened me like I’d never been frightened before.
When he’d said we could stop, I nearly burst into tears all over again. I knew if I didn’t go through with this now, I might not ever be brave enough to try a second time. So I asked for what I wanted.
And he smiled. It wasn’t predatory or demanding like I’d thought it might be, either. It was relieved. And surprisingly affectionate. I felt selfish for asking this of him, though, so I thought I’d better take care of his needs first. From the sizable bulge I felt underneath me, he’d be willing to take what I offered.
I didn’t know what to do specifically, but I thought I could figure it out. People did this sort of thing all the time. How difficult could it be? If it freaked me out too much or if I messed up, I’d just use my hand instead of my mouth. Hopefully, he wouldn’t mind. I pushed myself between his knees, my hand working to unbuckle his belt.
“Oh, no you don’t,” he said, his smile morphing into a smirk as his hands seized mine. Didn’t he want me to… you know?
“But…”
“I believe you asked me to do something for you.” He pulled my chin up so I’d have to meet his gaze, and I felt my face heat. He’d lifted one brow, as if waiting for my answer.
“Well, yes, but don’t men like it better when they go first?”
“Only men who are assholes,” he replied with a short laugh, but then his smile faded. “Wait. Is that the only type of man you’ve ever been with?”
Not able to answer that while looking right at him, I closed my eyes. “I’ve never been with anyone before,” I mumbled the words, not knowing how he’d take my revelation.
When I didn’t hear any response, I opened my eyes, half afraid of what I’d find. He stared at me as if dumbfounded, as if that’s the last thing he’d expected me to say. Maybe this was a turn off to men. Maybe they liked it better when the woman knew what she was doing. I wondered if he was about to reject my request, about to say forget it.
He glanced around the room as if just then realizing where we were, alone together i
n his small office at the restaurant where we both worked. I knew it might not be ideal, but I couldn’t care less. My body had become consumed with this aching need, and I was certain he was the only one who could satisfy it.
“Kelly, are you sure you want to do this now? Here? I know we got pretty carried away, but this isn’t the most comfortable of locations, especially not for your first time.”
“I know, but—”
“Are you on birth control?” he asked next, and I shook my head no. I’d never needed it so hadn’t ever taken the precaution. Lord, I was an idiot. Humiliated, I looked away.
But then, he pulled me into his lap, this time facing away from him. He tilted my head back and kissed me more deeply than he had previously, his hands tangling in my hair. The angle was different but just as thrilling, particularly when he sucked my tongue into his mouth.
I became lost to his kiss and couldn’t imagine it getting much better, when he lowered one hand to my left breast and the other to the space between my legs. Never having been touched there before other than to keep it cleanly shaven, I jumped a little.
“You okay?” he asked, his voice guttural and husky. I nodded and he continued, his lips on my neck as his fingers flew over both places with the lightest of caresses. “Christ, you’re so wet.”
While kneading my nipple, his other hand outlined my folds slowly, gently, increasing the pressure with each pass. Helpless and gasping, I bucked my hips, the movement involuntary and beyond my control.
He shifted his own hips, but it was to back away as he concentrated all his attention on me. I felt this delicious ache building inside of me, rising up like a flood and making the rest of the world vanish entirely. Spokes of pleasure spread from low in my abdomen and outward toward my chest, thighs and even toes.
It felt as if I was floating higher and higher without any risk of plummeting to the ground. It invigorated me, rejuvenated me. Freed me.
I’d started to make noises deep in my throat; I hadn’t intended to, it just sort of happened. Marco had latched his mouth onto my neck, then dragged his tongue up to nibble on my earlobe. I’d never imagined that being so turned on could feel this wonderful, this liberating. His touch was pure magic, and I didn’t want it to ever end.