At the time, it’d been a precious bounty.
Being here made me miss him terribly. I could see him in every chipped coffee mug, in that old cuckoo clock on the wall, on that scuff along the doorjamb where he’d always put his foot when his arms were full. I glanced over at the moth-eaten loveseat and beat-up recliner. Tara hadn’t replaced them even though I’d given her quite a bit of money.
The only proof that she’d spent any of it was in the shiny new silver laptop sitting on our breakfast nook. But then, she was thrifty just like me. We’d always had to be.
Tara had made some coffee, hash browns and bacon for us. I covered both the hash browns and the meat in ketchup and gobbled it all down like there was no tomorrow. When I wasn’t tossing my cookies, I felt famished to the point of hunger pangs. It was disconcerting. Not only to keep going from one extreme to the other, but to also crave stuff I didn’t typically eat.
My sister watched me with narrowed eyes, tapping her fingers on the table. “So, are you going to explain yourself or what.”
I almost said, “Or what.” Explaining things would be difficult considering I couldn’t tell her most of it. It might put her in danger. “Okay, so a lot has happened since I saw you last.”
“Yeah, I gathered as much. Why is it you’re just now coming home? It’s been four months, Moll. Four.”
Ugh. Here we went. I’d been wracking my brain to come up with a plausible enough story. I just hoped it worked. “I got offered this position with a company that required permanent and immediate residency. It’s kind of a high security clearance type of deal. But I’m on vacation for the next two weeks.”
“From the way you’re dressed and the amount of money you sent me, I’m guessing they pay well.”
“Very.” I nodded.
“But you’re not going to tell me about it? No specifics?”
“I can’t, except to say that I’m a manager.” That sounded innocuous enough. I couldn’t exactly come out and say, “Yeah, all these mafia dudes like to call me Queen Molly.”
“Wait, is this one of those, ‘I could tell you but then I’d have to kill you’ sort of things?” I nearly choked. That was so close to the truth that I couldn’t help it. She paused, then asked, “Is it like the military? Ben’s told me about positions like that, ones where people go on all these secret missions.”
I stayed silent. Ben Lopez was her boyfriend and a member of the Air Force. Unlike me, Tara hadn’t struggled with relationships. She’d dated around, met John when she was eighteen, and they’d been together ever since. It’d been two years now, and they seemed blissfully content.
I had no idea how her love life had turned out like a Hallmark movie while mine resembled nothing as much as a train wreck.
“Damn. I can’t believe you joined the military without telling me first,” she said.
So I wouldn’t have to say anything, I pushed out of my chair and went searching for some more food. I still felt way too empty. I found some celery and peanut butter and dunked the vegetable straight in. Remaining on my feet, I crunched my way through a few stalks before she said anything else.
“What is up with you?”
“What? I’m hungry.”
“They don’t feed you in this super clandestine organization you’re now a part of?”
I thought of Rosa’s lavish Sunday dinners, dinners I’d no longer go to. So I wouldn’t be there anymore, who cared? No big deal. Out of coffee now, I went to the pot. Customarily, I filled my cup with sugar and cream, but the aroma smelled so good plain that I drank it down black.
“Okay, no,” she said, and I peeked over at her. Tara stood, putting her hands on her hips. “I have never, not once, seen you drink coffee with nothing in it. You’ll pour it out first.”
“It tastes good this way.”
“It never tasted good to you before.” She had three wrinkles across her forehead as she squinted at me. I took a deep breath.
“I guess my tastes have changed now that I’m pregnant.”
For a long moment, she goggled at me, her eyes double their size. “You’re…”
“Yeah.”
“That one you’re going to have to explain.”
Careful to not say his name, I gave her an abridged version of my history with Luca. “I fell for this guy at work. But his life is complicated—”
“Code for married,” Tara interrupted, pursing her lips. “Go on.”