Who knows.
I handed Vic the letter. I watched him read it, his face contorting with emotion as his eyes scanned down. When he finished reading, he crumpled up the letter.
“What’re you doin’?” I exclaimed.
Vic threw the letter to the ground. “This is bullshit, Grace.”
“What?” I reached to pick up the letter.
“She called me when he died. Told me to come to the funeral. When I said no she called me ungrateful and said her life would’ve been better off without me.”
Stunned, I stopped reaching for the letter. Mama said that? “Maybe she was just sad that you didn’t come. She missed you.”
Vic hissed. “Right. Sure.” I didn’t know what had happened between Vic and Mama. What I did know was that all of it was in the past now, and it wasn’t worth dwelling on. I had a new family to look forward to. I had a new home and a new life to build. I also knew firsthand how hard it was to come back after finally getting away.
I gripped the rough, splintery banister for support. “Let’s just get those boxes donated.”
“Only enough room for two with the boxes in the car,” Vic stated, leaning back on his heels. “Lennox and I are gonna take it up.”
I shrugged. “Whatever works. Thanks.” Vic grunted in response and walked back inside. The screen door yelled as Vic opened it and the sound nearly brought back a floodgate of memories, but I tamped them down. The time for memories was fading. Leaning on my elbows, I could see the sun clawing its way up over the hills.
After Vic and Lennox left with the boxes, I went back into the house to find Eli. I tiptoed around (a habit from living there) and found him sitting on the floor in the empty living room.
“What’cha doin’?” I asked. Eli patted a spot next to him. I ambled over and cozied up next to his side. All these years later and next to him was still my favorite spot to be.
“You know, Bug, this is my first time inside this house.” I quirked my chin to get a better look at him. He sounded sad. “When I think about all the years you spent here…”
“Hush.” I placed my finger over his lips. “It’s over now. Look, we boxed everything up!” Even as I tried to cheer him up, I felt the sadness too. It was lingering, like a wicked nostalgia. Through our sadness, Eli cupped my chin and brought my lips to his. There, in the broken remains of my past, we kissed.
“Can we go to our sugar maple tree?” I asked quietly. It was the only thing left in that town that I still cared about.
A strange look crossed Eli’s features. “It’s not what it used to be, Bug.”
“What do you mean? It’s a tree. Trees don’t change.” I hopped up, pulling at Eli’s arms until he stood up.
In the daylight, without the rain, the town’s drastic change was much more noticeable. Where children had played and people had walked, there was nothing. No one. It was completely empty.
“What happened here?” I asked, skipping the rotten step on my porch. “It’s like everyone left.”
“They did,” Eli explained. “When Zero left, so did the people. To find new drugs. And then the businesses died. The only people here now are those living off social security, and even they are in the process of moving.”
Wow. Our town was dead and nearly buried.
As we walked down the dilapidated street, I wondered if anyone had lived in Mrs. Nelson’s house since she’d passed. Probably not. Mrs. Nelson had always kept good care of her house, but she didn’t have children, and those were the only people who would want a house in this kind of town.
Now that I’d returned, the town seemed so much smaller. When I’d lived there it had felt monstrous, like something I could never conquer, yet we were already turning into Mrs. Nelson’s. It had seemed like such a far trek when I was growing up. In reality, it was only a few minutes’ walk.
“Bug, wait!” Eli called after me as I ran to Mrs. Nelson’s back yard. It had always been the one place free from hate, free from corruption, like our own personal Eden. I couldn’t help the smile that formed on my lips as I crossed the threshold into the backyard.
Just as quickly as the smile formed, it fell.
In place of our towering and what I had believed to be eternal tree was a stump. I stared at the empty space, expecting something. I didn’t know what, but I expected something. I couldn’t believe it was just gone. That tree was more than just a plant. It was where we grew up, where we fell in love, where we became ourselves. And now it was gone.
I couldn’t stand it.
I fell to my knees.
“Bug?” Eli caught up to me and held my arm. He leaned down to meet my eyes, his voice concerned as he saw my reaction.