Melted.
Neruda she mouthed, before West dragged her off in a different direction.
I don’t know how I’m going to get her alone and give her the kiss she asked for, but if I had to start a fucking fire to clear the place, I would.
“Ah, there she is,” my mother said. She pointed toward the seven-foot Times Square ball drop re-creation that people had been taking selfies near all night. In script below the glowing ball it read: A New Crowne Year.
Lottie stood next to her mother, and I knew what was coming next. Go join Lottie, go be a good husband and father.
I left before my mother could say it aloud.
“Grayson!” Lynette crooned. “You look so handsome. More and more like your father every day.” I swore I saw a flash in her eyes. “Well, I’ll leave you two alone.” She winked at Lottie and left us.
Lottie watched her mother walk away, eyes glassy. “They want us to kiss, and then they’ll say it was taken at midnight. Our New Year’s kiss. So fucking romantic.”
“Lottie—”
She turned to me. “I told my mother we’d meet them on the terrace after, for the fireworks, but I think in a few minutes I’m going to get really sick…and maybe I won’t be able to take this photo.” Her eyes met mine, letting her true meaning sink in.
I didn’t know what to do with this new Lottie.
I didn’t know how to trust her.
On the terrace, her mother and mine watched us as we talked.
“I…” I rubbed the back of my neck.
I’m sorry I’m not the father of our child you deserve.
I’m sorry your dream turned into a nightmare.
I’m sorry.
“I’m gonna go.”
“Of course,” she said easily.
I slipped out of the ballroom as she went to join her mother and mine on the terrace. It wasn’t even ten-thirty, but maybe I could hide in our room, and when Story got the chance, she’d do the same.
STORY
A servant walked by with a tray of sparklers topping trifles in champagne flutes. I watched them disappear into the crowd, gold sparks bursting.
I hadn’t seen Grayson again, but he’d responded to my message, and I clung to his five words:
Anything for you, little wife.
It was still early in the night, the sun a glimmering orange line on the horizon. Tansy’s famous hour-long midnight firework show hadn’t begun, and I know we’d agreed to wait until just before then, but I wanted to leave now.
Be free of West before another year began.
As if sensing I was thinking about Grayson, West pulled me tight against his hip. “Want to make a bet? You’ll sleep in my bed tonight.”
“This again.” I pushed off him. “I’m not dumb, West. It’s a catch-22. If I choose you, then I don’t choose Grayson, and I have no need to sleep with you.”
“Ah, but, it’s the only way to save your prince, and you and Grayson have a bad habit of martyring yourselves. It gets so lonely in my bed… I might be tempted to share a video if you’re not there.”
I turned to glare, and West was already staring down at me intently.